Cant Take That Away From Me

Everything was going fine, I knew it was happening but I just didn’t want to make things more complicated than it already was. It was up till that day, that very day… where everything changed. Things will never be the same again, since then. I was expecting myself to come up with an idea on how react to it on a particular day, except that I really had no idea on how to make it out of the ordinary. Questions had been raised, and the response wasn’t exactly what I had expected. It was, somehow…much more meaningful than that. So genuine… so sweet…

It was supposed to become clear to me after everything that had been through, but deep down… I still don’t know the actual answer. Nobody has yet taken away my weakness which I have been trying to overcome over the years before. I’m afraid that I will allow my weakness to wipe out what has been built before. The past are just part of my excuses of what I had turned into, the past are just part of my excuses of trying to deny the truth. I know it doesn’t matter, but it really does concern me, and it still does.

“You will never know if you never try”.

But it’s always easier said than done right? Also, I know I am afraid to accept changes, afraid of what people have to think, and afraid of ruining everything again. There are always questions of what-if in the future that can never be answered by me, or by anyone else.

I am trying, no, I have tried, but without success. It was, by far the most embarrassing and the most foolish thing that I have ever done. And each time I think about that incident really makes me feel like slapping myself hard for being so stupid. I really regretted because I don’t want it to happen because of another accident, again.

Godz, why is it always has to be like this?

Why am I running away as usual?

Will I ever be good enough?

I know you must be thinking, what the heck is Yen-Yen talking about? Hahahaha..
The truth is… I’m not too sure myself. Damn, such an emotional post. So, this is just another one of my crappy posts which nobody, hopefully can understand.


Okay, I think it’s time for me to wake up from my dream and return to reality.