I now earned a bad reputation from certain colleagues. Most of them just laughed it off about the whole incident, some were really concerned, some were disappointed and some didn't bother about it at all. Two people ticked me off about my behaviour on that night. I was really hurt when they said that and a little ashamed of what I had done before, but I've never regretted it, even now.
I know it's all my fault and I volunteered to go for it, yet both of them came up with a conclusion that the guys were playing me instead. It wasn't their fault, I think. It was more of mine.. I wanted to go drunk. I wanted to feel like I can do anything without having my self esteem or my limit to bring me down.
Rumours really spread fast in small associates.
Almost everyone knew, even the ones who didn't attend the dinner. The first thing people started asking me was, "Are you okay?" I didn't know the situation was that bad until I found out from my friend what really happened. The whole thing was 10 times worse that I thought.
I know what I did is wrong, but I did it for a really obvious reason and I'm not planning to deny it. I just want to let everything off on that night.
The funny thing was, someone even recorded the scene. I'm still keeping my fingers crossed as I haven't watched it yet.
***
I know it's all my fault and I volunteered to go for it, yet both of them came up with a conclusion that the guys were playing me instead. It wasn't their fault, I think. It was more of mine.. I wanted to go drunk. I wanted to feel like I can do anything without having my self esteem or my limit to bring me down.
Rumours really spread fast in small associates.
Almost everyone knew, even the ones who didn't attend the dinner. The first thing people started asking me was, "Are you okay?" I didn't know the situation was that bad until I found out from my friend what really happened. The whole thing was 10 times worse that I thought.
I know what I did is wrong, but I did it for a really obvious reason and I'm not planning to deny it. I just want to let everything off on that night.
The funny thing was, someone even recorded the scene. I'm still keeping my fingers crossed as I haven't watched it yet.
***
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